O'Brien: "Let me guess... torture?"
Odo: "No. You got drunk last night and lost at strip domjot to Morn. Keiko will be here in a few minutes."
O'Brien: "Oh yeah... torture..."
Kira: "I have an announcement to make. I'm pregnant, and one of you is the father."
O'Brien: "Oh crap!
Worf: "Oh crap!
Jadzia: "Oh crap!
Bashir: "Oh... I wish I could say, Oh crap!"
Sisko "Just once, I'd like a regular, normal Christmas. A little eggnog... a fuckin' Christmas tree... a little turkey. But, no! I gotta crawl around in this motherfuckin' tin can!"
O'Brien: "I think I ate too much turkey."
Jadzia: "It's traditional. You can always get Julian to pump your stomach."
Odo: "Do we have to watch this? I only want to watch Doctor Who."
Jem Hadar: "Will you muppets pipe down, we want to watch this..."
"And now on KBC, it is 3pm, and time for the Klingon Chancellor's Kristmas Message."