I'm not saying he didn't care about Vulcans destruction. It's the only time he loses control is when Kirk's involved, first when Kirk staged his mutiny by illegally boarding the ship with Scotty and the second time when he "died". It's as if the only person that can get a rise out of Spock is Kirk.
And little kids calling him names.
It's funny that at the end of STD he is just the very same character as in the beginning of ST09.