I've presented my take on the issue. I think Kommander
has a good clear view of the situation, but now it's time to act.
I agree with the old saying, recognizing the problem is half the battle. You just need to take that next step, and that's the big stumbling block at this point.
My sense is that all of this humming and hawing, debating, etc, is really an attempt to change the subject rather than making the necessary changes in his life.
As for the fedora, well, I think people should wear what they want. Each person should choose their own style. It's true that some styles will put others off, but as long as he is aware of that, no problem. As far as I'm concerned, the fedora is a non-issue in this discussion.