Now as to where the aliens are.. on a philosophical standpoint it might be that we are simply not that interesting to begin with. We are volatile, fearful of new things, greedy and vengeful and the simple revelation that there are Aliens might topple our entire worldwide system because of mass panic.
Alien life is rare. And when something is rare, the is no such thing as "not interesting".
Can you prove your statement that alien life is rare? For all we know there is life under the ice on Europa, Life could have existed on Mars at one point. We only really have life on Earth to act as a basis of what we call life, so there might be life existing somewhere were we didn't think it could exist. At one point didn't we believe that life couldn't exist in the deep oceans on Earth?
I suspect when alien life is discovered it might not be exactly what we were expecting it to look like.
Life might be rare it might be fairly common or anywhere inbetween we have no way of knowing. All we can perhaps say we is to a reasonable degree the number of celestial objects which have life on them is infinitesimal when comapred to the number of celestial objects