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Old July 20 2013, 05:28 AM   #1
Rear Admiral
Location: fresno, ca, us
Turning 50 on the 22d...

...and I feel a bit depressed. I used to look forward to my birthday, even if we didn't make a big thing out of it. Now? Not so much.

I'm not looking at my mortality and wondering if I left a mark or anything. I know that I've helped people, especially classmates, do and become things they honestly might not have done without some help at the right time. I may not directly impact the world, but, as I've said in the past, I've been the catalyst to help others do big things.

But I'm down a bit. My husband wants to take me out on Sunday, but I know what will happen. We'll make a reservation someplace nice, then he'll get upset about something am hour before, start an argument, and things either get cancelled or have a cloud over them. I just don't want that for a birthday dinner, especially this one. I'd rather do nothing than have that memory for a 50th birthday.

Any ideas for the birthday blues?
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