You should be able to select multiple options here. He's great AND a jerk!
I think the reason Enterprise culture seemed more insular than DS9 was that there was less traffic through Enterprise. People didn't come to the Enterprise on vacation, and there aren't random business dealings going on throughout the ship. Anyone on Enterprise was there for official business, so there were less opportunities to show off a character's social circle.
But it seemed to me Riker had plenty of friends off the Enterprise, more than the rest of the crew except Picard. Not even counting his parade of one night stands he had connections at seedy gambling joints, multiple references to former crew.
I liked Riker's role in the command structure. It's true he didn't have a 'specialty' like most of the other crew so he had less opportunities to save the day but he was always able to make efficient command decisions in pressure situations.
I'm not sure I would classify those examples as snooty so much as, on a Starfleet ship having the expectation of Roddenberrian Starfleet discipline. Not unreasonable for a military command structure, IMO.