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Old June 18 2013, 12:34 AM   #25
Re: Have You Ever Changed Your Mind...

HaventGotALife wrote: View Post
I think I accept less of what someone tells me to do and try to find the answers myself, be committed to the truth, even if it hurts.
I learned this very quickly when I was a kid.

As a kid, I was somewhat of a compulsive fibber, where I was led to believe I was getting away with everything. My parents didn't confront me directly on it, but pretty much it seemed like I was being thwarted by them indirectly on just about everything I was fibbing about. When I was older as an adult, my parents eventually told me outright they knew all along what I was doing, but didn't want to directly rain on my parade. (Essentially they were practicing some form of "reverse psychology" on me. I had to figure things out on my own through repeated failures).

As a byproduct of all this, from an early age I was able to figure out the likelihood of whether somebody was lying to me in person, and I became skeptical of stuff anybody said to me. Largely in my own mind, I was always thinking: "Is this the type of lie (or omission) I would have said in this situation?"

When I was a teenager and young adult, I was frequently confronting acquaintances, friends, speakers, teachers, etc ... on what they said, if I suspected they were being misleading or outright lying. (This was the in days before the internet and google). It shouldn't be too surprising that I was a very unpopular person, and didn't have many close friends when I was younger.

Through adulthood, it took me a long time to eventually figure out how human behavior and etiquette functioned in practice. Essentially I gradually went from being a "Sheldon Cooper" know-it-all type person (from the tv show "Big Bang Theory"), to behaving as a "normal" and semi-inconspicuous person.

I eventually came to the realization that many people over age 30 generally do not change their minds easily. So these days, I don't even bother attempting to confront somebody on whether they are being misleading or outright wrong. It is largely an exercise in futility. Other people have to figure things out for themselves on their own.

Over the last few years of going through an extended mid-life crisis, I've been starting to see the wisdom of how my parents raised me.
jayceee is offline   Reply With Quote