As I said, cosmic squirrels -- they must surely defecate...
But no, the numbers don't appear to add up if you assume dark matter is baryonic.
Re Crazy Eddie
's curved spacetime, which appears to be envisaged as being a patchwork of Minkowski spacetimes, although I might be wrong. Perhaps it might have difficulty explaining effects such as frame dragging, although the experimental results for that are somewhat inconclusive.
Certainly, a new theory would have to be consistent with the large amount of experimental evidence already collected.