Huh I didn't actually write anything about whether Jerry should or should not empathize with him. I did write about Jerry thinking he was responsible for Michael leaving. But since it was a medical issue, Jerry was wrong. That's what I was addressing, so your post doesn't really make sense in response to mine.
As for Jerry being an ass - he was absolutely not polite about the whole situation and he can certainly be blamed for not being a nice person about it.
Michael was a very private individual about most things. He wanted to keep private about it. Calling that "shameful" seems like your issue, not his.