It is very obvious that replicator usage is either free or rationed (Sisko talks about having used up all of his transporter credits to beam home every evening as a cadet). Given that there does not seem to be any obesity the latter is probably not necessary.
While Kirk does have an appartment with a beautiful view in TWOK the captain quarters in all series are as large as those of ordinary crewmembers.
In the fictionl future of Trek people do their jobs because they love them, not because they have to work to pay the rent and the bills. All tedious work is done by machines and the few civilians we have seen, Picard's brother and Sisko's father, do very obviously love their work. And this shouldn't surprise us, when you are relatively well-off you don't choose the best-paying but the most interesting job. And you don't lay around on the sofa all day because you wanna feel useful.
We are not purely hedonistic creatures and again the example from Trek is Picard's brother. He could have a far easier time if he used the replicator but he prefers real wine and real cooking.
Same with the people on the frontier. They could enjoy the easy life in the core of the Federation but they seemingly want some excitement and some challenges in their life so they choose the harder life on a colony.
The happy life is thought to be one of excellence; now an excellent life requires exertion, and does not consist in amusement.