Language may indeed be a democracy, but it isn't anarchy. There have to be authoritative sources on usage, grammar, and orthography, or else we all become like Humpty-Dumpty.
And this source
, along with every other writing guide on the web, says "alot" isn't a word.
That's not true at all. That's like saying music doesn't exist unless you know how to read and write the notes. As someone pointed out already, you've got it backwards. The language evolves before the rules. Instead of reading guides on grammer why not read about the development of language and linguistics? It's way more interesting and might correct some of the misconceptions you seem to have. Try Steven Pinker, he's always a fun read, and a member of the Luxuriant Flowing Hair Club for Scientists