The first time I saw you, you were (Doing impressive thing). From that moment I never doubted that you belonged on this ship. Until now. When we join the Federation we give an oath, to hold ourselves to a certain standard of morality, of dignity, and responsibility. By soaking me with a bucket of water, you failed to live up to that oath. We are not Starfleet officers only when we are on duty, we are Starfleet officers and must live up to those standards every minute of the day, no matter what our personal feelings or if violating that oath would be really funny!
Now return to your station!