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Old April 4 2013, 04:53 PM   #171
Locutus of Bored
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Re: Defending Admiral Cain from Battlestar Galactica(mentions Dick Che

Stoo wrote: View Post
Next week on scifi villain apologism: "carter burke: not that bad really".
[RandomFan] He was a great guy, and a brilliant tactician for a businessman.

Linkin Park did far worse than anything he did, which was fairly mild. They recorded tracks for the Transformers films, so clearly anything Burke did pales in comparison to that monstrous act. Oops, wrong Lincoln and Park.

It doesn't matter that no one here is defending the more questionable of Lincoln's, Park's, or FDR's actions from either a timely or a modern context (which BSG society is roughly supposed to be analogous to but with some major technological perks), I'll just keep mentioning them over and over again anyway like that's an actual argument.

Plus, asI've already demonstrated, as long as you improve the economy, all crimes are forgiven. And since 90% of the Aliens-universe economy seems to be centered around Weyland-Yutani, making a few human sacrifices in the name of the bioweapons division is a small price to pay for economic prosperity.

Gorman showed up with Burke at Ripley's apartment, so clearly he was a good guy, because Gorman never made any mistakes himself, right? His impression of Burke must be unquestionable.

Plus, Burke shoved Gorman aside and said "you had your chance" when he was trying to prevent Ripley from rescuing the ambushed Colonial Marines, so obviously Burke's whole mission was just to save the Marines. Never mind that he was only saving them long enough to get him and his potential alien incubators Ripley and Newt off the planet safely, after which he was going to sabotage their cryopods in midflight. I'll just keep mentioning his selfless defense of the Marines as if that was his actual mission all along and ignore everything that doesn't fit my narrative.

Also, like Admiral Cain, Burke was a tactical genius when he sealed himself off from the only people with weapons in a building full of xenomorphs, even though they explicitly stated that they would bring him back to Earth to expose his crimes, and Earth was where The Company seems to control practically everything, so I'm sure they could have gotten him off. But hey, tactical genius.

Oh, yeah, also STRAWMAN! STRAWMAN! STRAWMAN! GODWIN! GODWIN! GODWIN! It doesn't matter if it's not a strawman if it's actually quotable arguments I've made, or that there's nothing wrong with mentioning Hitler or the Nazis if the situation is actually comparable to Hitler or the Nazis, I'm not going to address those types of lazy arguments. I'll just repeat the same discredited points 500 times, because that's not lazy. [/RandomFan]

There, that should handle his next forty posts or so. Just make the same type of arguments about Cain and you're all set.
'First Contact' is the tale of a man who just wants to cash in on his creation so he can get wasted on an island full of naked women, but his fans keep insisting that he's a saintly visionary who has profoundly altered the world. AKA - 'I Don't Want to be a Statue: The Gene Roddenberry Story.'
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