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Old April 1 2013, 02:11 PM   #1952
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Location: Ireland
Re: TheGodBen Revisits Deep Space Nine

Apologies all for not getting this up sooner, but I was busy recently, and a little ill, and a little lazy, so I didn't get around to it until this weekend. But hey, it wouldn't be one of my review threads without unexplained delays.

Star Trek Deep Space Nine Review

Taking account of all seven seasons and 173 episodes, DS9's average score is 5.271. That is the highest score of any Star Trek series I've reviewed, narrowly beating Enterprise by 0.065. But DS9 was trounced by Babylon 5, which had an average score of 6.121. Why is this? Just look at the trendline, it shows only a slight increase in quality across the seasons, whereas Babylon 5 improved massively from its lacklustre first season. It's almost as if DS9 just kept repeating its first season over and over again with slight fluctuations so that the graph doesn't look quite so repetitive to the casual observer.

This graph is quite telling, DS9 fluctuated from poor episodes to good ones with very few average episodes in between. This is very similar to the final graph for Enterprise, but the numbers are bigger.

I rated 83 episodes below average, 3 episodes average, and 87 episodes above average.

Top and Bottom 10 Episodes

173. Let He Who Is Without Sin...
172. Profit and Lace
171. The Alternate
170. The Emperor's New Cloak
169. Blood Oath
168. Second Skin
167. Ferengi Love Songs
166. Duet
165. The Die is Cast
164. Profit and Lace
10. Improbable Cause
9. Meridian
8. Call to Arms
7. Rocks and Shoals
6. Profit and Lace
5. Necessary Evil
4. Profit and Lace
3. The Visitor
2. Duet
1. The Magics of Megas-tu

The Writers

Honestly, I don't see the point in even bothering to run the numbers or make a graph for this segment because it's obvious Ron Moore is going to win. I'm a huge Ron Moore fanboy and I've stacked the episode scores in his favour since season 3. So, congratulations to Ron, you're a perfect specimen of a man.

Final Statistics

Runabouts Lost: 36
Form of... : 69
Wormhole in Peril: 3
Sykonee's Counter: 0
Stupid French Things: 63,460,000 (2011 estimate)

Season 1 Average: 5.271
Season 2 Average: 5.271
Season 3 Average: 5.271
Season 4 Average: 5.271
Season 5 Average: 5.271
Season 6 Average: 5.271
Season 7 Average: 5.272

Overall Average: 5.271

Voyager Overall Average: 2.657
Enterprise Overall Average: 5.206
Babylon 5 Selected Average: 11.769

Rankings: B5 > DS9 > ENT > VOY > BrBa

Final Judgement

My final judgement is that if you read this far and still don't get that this is an April Fools joke then you're a fool. An April Fool. Which I guess makes today your birthday? I don't know, I don't even know why I spent an hour doing this.
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"No one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away." - The immortal Terry Pratchett
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