Riker's trombone playing was so bad, it often triggered the Red Alert Alarms.
Riker: How did Deanna get up there?!
Worf: Okay, you two, go ten paces, turn around, then draw.
Troi: Beverly, we're supposed to be doing martial arts not Lamaze breathing exercises.
Riker: Whoops, hope that Tricorder wasn't very valuable!