Thanks for the feedback. I do like the flow of HaplessCrewman's copy better than what I had, but I like the order Ziz is suggesting. I prefer the more declarative copy. I've credited both of you for the help on DA; pm me your email addresses and I can credit the both of you on the back cover (if you'd like).
I also changed some of shading throughout, and the credits have been corrected for running time and year (1996). Link