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Old January 13 2013, 06:10 AM   #34
Location: Detroit
Re: Painters: Need help impressing a girl.

Rhubarbodendron wrote: View Post
Well, since you have pretty much decided your strategy, how about asking her to paint a portrait of you? That way she'd feel a bit less obliged and under pressure. And it'd at least add a remotely romantic touch to the whole affair.
If she needs prompting to get ideas flowing, I'm going to suggest something abstract or metaphorical; focus on what she's feeling rather than what she's painting. She doubts herself a little too much. If I asked her to do a portrait she'd probably be worried about not being good enough, and impressing me with her skill isn't the point. She does a lot of fantasy/mythological imagery, I don't even know if she'd want to do a portrait.

Ood Sigma wrote: View Post
How about taking her to a painting class... Painting With A Twist is a good one, and it looks like there are two in your area. I participated in one last weekend and even though I'm no artist it was fun and would be good for a date.
I'd like to avoid painting myself if possible. While watching me try to paint would definitely help her with the self-doubt issue, as it would be really bad, I really don't want to be doing any painting myself. Her and I have plenty of other common interests that she might find inspiring without me having to paint anything.

Although... when I do what the thread is about. If she's hesitant to get started, maybe then I should paint something, or get it started. If the final result is a painting we worked on together, that might have some special meaning. I'm probably going to ad-lib most of it based on her reaction, but it helps to have ideas ahead of time. Thanks for mentioning this.

Robert D. Robot wrote: View Post
I'd say have a nice hike or a stroll through a museum together. That sounds like an excellent idea to me. During those strolls discussions about her art and interests could be the best inspiration for her to get back to creating again....
This I could do. I have to do a school thing at the Detroit Institute of Arts and I'm going to ask her to go with me, but that's not until April. Maybe I'll do something before then.

thestrangequark wrote: View Post
Depends on what kind of paint she uses, watercolor, acrylics, or oils. The supplies for each will be very different.
Yeah, I need to try to get a look at her stuff. I doubt she uses oils, given that they're always expensive. Maybe she'd like to if I can find the budget for it? Actually, it probably doesn't matter what supplies I get. Given I am not a painter and she knows this, she'll probably be impressed if I get stuff from an actual art store and not present her with paints and brushes I bought at Home Depot.

Tora Ziyal wrote: View Post
Do you know for sure that she doesn't still have supplies that she just isn't using?
I'm sure she does, but not that I have access to and can set up. If I use her supplies, at best she figures out what I'm up to, at worst she'd be pissed about me stealing her stuff.

thestrangequark wrote: View Post
I go through phases myself: I don't draw or paint at all for several months at a time, but then have a massive creative spurt 2 to 3 times per year, lasting 2 weeks to a month at a time, and during which I can produce dozens of drawings and/or paintings. Maybe she just doesn't feel like painting.
Her and I have discussed it. She wants to get painting again, the only issue is the lack of inspiration. I also said I'd like to help her with it if possible. Her response was along the lines of "you've got your work cut out for you."

Hmm... I just realized I already have implied consent to do what I'm going to do. Kommander: 1; Doubty McBuzzkill: 0

teacake wrote: View Post
Are you sleeping with her? If so I'm thinking body paint is the way to start. Tell her you've always wanted to be a forest, you have tried to do it yourself but it is awkward.. have a lot of greens and browns and yellow body paints and brushes on hand. Use 'em up a bit so it looks like you did attempt this. Wouldn't hurt to get some under your fingernails too.
I have slept with her, in the sense that we slept in the same bed after the NYE party, there was lots of cuddling, and it was awesome. I have not had sex with her yet.

I actually think she might go for something like this. It doesn't really appeal to me though. We'll see.

nightwind1 wrote: View Post
It's totally NOT a good idea, it's borderline stalker-y to just spring it on her.
I have a problem with statements like this. Actions in themselves are not creepy or stalker-y, how the target of said actions perceives them is what's important.

If I bought her a ring and purposed right now, it would be creepy as fuck. If I do it three or four years from now, probably not. My actions would be exactly the same. However, her perceptions would change between dating me for two weeks and dating me for several years.

Even typical stalker behavior, such as tracking people down, or driving past someone's house repeatedly; it's not the behavior, it's that it's unwanted.

As for my situation: The thing with this girl isn't exactly typical "dating." We connected, and are thoroughly impressed with each other. We got talking a little after midnight, and then the next thing we knew it was 9am, the party ended hours ago, and everyone else had either left or gone to bed. I'm a smoker, and the house was non-smoking. Do you have any idea how thoroughly engrossed in a conversation I have to be to go more than eight hours without a cigarette when I've been drinking? Before that night, my record was three. We went to bed, got up around four, and then spent another several hours talking and only left because the home owner made us leave. I never asked her out, and she didn't ask me out. We just mutually decided "we're dating now." Well, she did ask for my phone number, but we'd need some way to contact each other in order to date.

My point is, her and I have the rapport necessary for me to try something like this. If we didn't, I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it.

Grey wrote: View Post
Me, personally, I use little tiny canvases (4 x 6 inches and smaller) and those are pretty cheap. Were you thinking of getting one of those huge stand-to-paint-on-it canvases or something kinda smaller?
I was thinking something medium-sized, but I should probably find out what size she normally uses and go for something similar to that. I think 18" by 11" or so, but I'm going on cell phone pictures so that's only a rough estimate; could be anything really. If she uses various sizes I'll go for something in the middle: enough room to work with without it feeling overwhelming or cramped. If she seems to prefer a particular size I'll go for something close to that.

Grey wrote: View Post
As for the springing this on an artist thing...if someone did this to me, they probably wouldn't get a painting so much as a self-deprecating laugh and a shrug off. But I'd appreciate the new art supplies.
That's probably about the worst reaction I'd expect from her. If that's what happens, maybe the new supplies will help to get her going again. So, mission accomplished.
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