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Old January 11 2013, 12:19 AM   #13
Mr. Laser Beam
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Re: Things old ladies do...

Nobody ever made me an afghan.

Cookies, on the other hand...my one grandmother used to cookie-bomb me at the slightest opportunity. She would bombard me with care packages full of the damn things when I was in college and so I would share them with everyone who lived on my dorm room floor. I'd use them to get people to shut the hell up so I could get some sleep. I found that bribery works if it's cookie based... "Here, have some cookies, now turn down your fucking stereo."
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It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning. It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
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