Kids. I'm never going to have any of my own, so I have no interest in your brat's dance recital/soccer game/report card.
In fact, a few weeks ago at work, I was at my desk while one of my co-workers and a project manager were in my manager's office, which is about six feet from my desk. Now, there are a few of us in the IT department who routinely put in an hour or two of (unpaid) overtime every night, because we're that short-staffed and the sales department keeps making promises to clients that they don't personally have to fulfill - we do. But outside of IT, the rest of the building is a ghost town at 5:01PM every night (and even in IT, there are only about two or three of us who stay late every night - I rarely get home before 8:30, and four nights a week, I'm the one who sets the alarm before I go because I'm the last one out).
All of a sudden, I heard the project manager say to my fellow developer, "You can't be tired - you don't have kids," and our manager expressed agreement.
Just because we don't have kids, that doesn't make our lives any less fulfilling or any less jam-packed.
Mind you, the manager is the same person who has said to me on four occasions, "This is why you need a wife." (I guess he doesn't understand the significance of the rainbow triangle on the poster in my cubicle, and has never read the accompanying text...)
Point is, stop trying to make it sound like your life is so much better because you've got an opposite-sex spouse with whom you've procreated. I'm not interested.
I am a big Facebook whore. I love me some Facebook, but even I keep the Facebook talk out of real life conversation, unless I happen to see something that is relevant to a conversation I'm already having.
I loves me some facebook drama. And I am not ashamed.
Oh, you'd love what happened in a post I made earlier this week. Funny thing is, all I was doing was describing a dream I'd had the previous night. It turned into an epic smackdown against an acquaintance (I wouldn't actually call him a friend) who had, essentially, accused me of being a liar. Funny thing is, the acquaintance didn't unfriend me and stomp off in a huff when he was shown to be wrong (he's probably basking in the attention, truth be told).
Oh, another conversational topic I hate is what happened last night on [insert television show here]. Most people who know me know that while I have the TV on for background noise, I'm rarely actually paying attention to it, except for a few science fiction shows. Telling me about the most recent episode of How I Met Your Mother holds no interest for me. After I've responded by saying that I don't watch the show, and telling you what I do watch, saying, "Oh, but you should - it's so funny!" is an even less enthralling conversational gambit.
(I have nothing against television - I'm not one of those people who responds to the topic by suggesting that you're inferior for watching it, unlike a former co-worker who went around bragging to everyone in sight that she didn't have a TV, and only went to subtitled foreign-language movies. I just find that most shows don't hold my interest.)