Nerys Ghemor wrote:
But he does get sick after he jerked off, doesn't he?
Evolution at its best
That's very dismissive of what I assure you is a very serious problem. You're implying here that I'm being foolish because I continue to engage in some degree of sexual activity despite knowing it hurts me. If I knew how to switch my sexual capacity off I would, in a heartbeat. "Don't ejaculate" might seem a simple solution, and believe me it's a state I've been desperate to reach for years, but it's so incredibly difficult. Not because I'm somehow obsessed with sexual activities but because the urge for periodic sexual release is a very, very powerful one. A natural one. Repressing sex drive is difficult and not healthy, and at my age basically impossible. And, yes, people like myself are quite aware that when we give in to that urge we're hurting ourselves. That's why one sufferer compared it to a drug addiction - the periodic, overwhelming need to do something you know is damaging your health and want to stop doing but can't
. Which is partly why severe depression and feelings of guilt and shame accompany the illness. And keep in mind that the analogy is imperfect - we're not "addicts", because we don't "jerk off" any more than most men do, in fact we likely do it less, for obvious reasons. But the urge for periodic release is overpowering, and it only takes a few moments of weakness to throw another week of your life under the bus. And keep in mind that one of the effects of the great anxiety that accompanies some forms of depression is an increased urge for comfort and relief through sexuality. Indeed, heightened sexuality is a symptom of the dysphoric manic depression which I might
experience (assesments are still ongoing). And finally, if you don't engage in sexual activity your body will do it anyway
, in your sleep or in the half-sleep doze of the early morning. I know from experience that if I manage to go more than a month without sexual activity, my body will just do it in the night anyway.
I don't mean to be rude, but this isn't a case of "my arm hurts when I do this
" (he says, twisting his arm round to an unnatural angle) to which the doctor says "don't do it then". This is about people like myself being made ill - physically and mentally - by something that their body naturally desires to happen, and which doesn't like being resisted. If it were as simple as just deciding not to masturbate, there wouldn't be such a problem.