You sound like me, so do what I did.
Be stupid, have LOADS of sex with different people, sometimes with condoms, sometimes without, think you got HIV, move 200 miles away from everyone you ever knew to a very isolated place, work as much as you can, drink, work, drink some more, and pretend everything is fine as you wake up crying before your morning drink. Because when you are in as isolated place as I was, it's normal to be drunk 24/7.
More seriously (but I was serious above) at my two most "professional" jobs I have been tipsy. One of them I got the permanent job from an interview in which I was tipsy before hand and told my big boss that my direct boss was a lazy, incompetent, arrogant, asshole who makes the job a living hell. The other job was stressing me out and I got wasted on Mother's Day, made me MUCH more friendly. Honestly just have a few drinks to level you out a little bit. Makes life a lot more fun.