There are a lot of people on this board who are familiar with depression of various sorts, either their own or someone they are close to. You will not be belittled here.
I was diagnosed with dysthymia in my 40s, low-grade chronic depression. NO self-confidence; NO self-esteem. Every new challenge was NEW; I had no carry-over feeling of accomplishment. Physiologically impossible. So my efforts "try harder" only led to frustration and further emotional issues.
That's what happens to many people with other types of depression, too. Because all your efforts cannot always overcome something with a physiological cause. So see a professional who will offer to address the physiological cause, if any, but will also provide advice on what you CAN do that will help (cuz "try harder" ain't gonna cut it when you've been trying your whole life).
Best of luck and don't be afraid here.