...But the Excalibur
is not obliterated.
Indeed, a ship that took exactly identical damage in TOS lost no crew at all - the entire lot of 400 was quoted as having beamed down safely so that they could be killed in a different manner.
Exactly identical looking damage from a distance shot doesn't equal same damage when viewed close-up. Also, one was an anti-proton weapon and the other is a phaser blast. Kinda hard to compare...