I think Jeyl that your view on the women of Trek actually says more about you than it does about the show, the characters and the writers intentions.
Which is what?
And if you really want to see the intentions, just look up Maurice Hurley. This is the man who was responsible for getting Gates McFadden off the show (with some reports saying that he sexually harassed her), and re-wrote the Phase 2 story without ever reading the original script. I don't think it's a stretch to say that TNG didn't have the most well meaning writers onboard. All the writers who actually wanted to do something special with Star Trek had already left by season 2. Heck, DC Fontana had her NAME removed from "The Naked Now" because the episode was so poorly handled. And that was the first regular episode.
And the participants in the BluRay extra features are pretty open about this subject as well. Patrick Stewart talks about how he felt there was a bit of sexism going on in the show when it first started out and how DC Fontana originally wanted more female crew members for the Enterprise like the chief engineer. It's sad considering that both the head of security and the chief engineer are all replaced with the male members of the cast, and any potential female characters that are brought in (Like Season Two's Sonya Gomez) are just abandoned and forgotten. It's not until Gene wasn't in total control of the series and outside writers came in that we were able to get shows that not only gave us new prominent female characters, but also gave the female characters we already had something to do. Crusher took command of the Enterprise in Descent 1 & 2, Ensign Ro was a pretty big regular.