I listen to everybody. That doesn't mean I agree. I love tsq
and she's absolutely right about the rotten things that go on in this world, but I don't agree that it relates to this thread. Should we really modify our behavior or culture based on the lowest denominator? Should I (or you) stop admiring the artistic nudes at the museum (or on deviantArt) because some slobs in NYC ain't got no couth? If we do that, to coin a phrase, don't the terrorists win?
But I never said anything even remotely like that. You know I wouldn't; I'm an artist...I paint nudes...I paint female
nudes. I've shared them here! That's a slippery-slope logical fallacy and completely misrepresents what I tried to say.
Anyway, the behaviors are clearly the same: just because the venue is different doesn't mean the attitude and how it affects women changes. A poster in this very thread admitted to doing this on FB, albeit unwittingly, wich perfectly illustrates the point I'm trying to make: this attitude isn't isolated. If it were isolated to this thread, it might be fine, but it carries over into other threads, onto other websites, and into the real world (where it began). Every time I post a picture in the picture thread I do so knowing that in all likelihood there will soon be one or more crass comments made about it, it is something I have accepted
as the trade-off for sharing photos with my friends. That is the reality of the environment on this board. Is that the environment we should be promoting?
As to the story about the midwives and the calendar, there is a reason it makes an impression -- it's the same reason people usually find Chippendales funny and are so surprised by the success of 50 Shades of Grey
, and that is: women do not do this as much as men, and women don't have a several millennia-long history of sexually repressing men. It's turnabout, it's unexpected, and that's what makes it humorous. The baggage matters here, because Women's Lib is not complete.
Calling people out on their sexism and actively discussing how this thread and the behavior in it make the women here feel is not "Letting the terrorists win." Who is the terrorist in this hyperbolic scenario? Me? Because I don't want to lie down and accept that people saying crass things about my appearance is just part and parcel of posting on the BBS or taking a walk in the city? Because I recognize the very obvious relationship between men thinking it's okay to behave this way in this thread, and men thinking it's okay to behave this way in the Picture Thread, on Facebook, and on the street?
Women have left the board because of this attitude. Women have stopped posting pictures here because of this attitude. People have said to me, "If New York's so bad, why don't you move?" and "If you don't want the attention, why do you dress the way you do?" And my answer is: Not
talking about this is letting them win. Giving up sharing pictures with my friends because of this is letting them win. Moving away from a city I love, or changing my style would be letting them win.
, you know I like you and we've always gotten along fine, but when you see every woman who is posting in this thread telling you you're wrong, don't you think it might be time to rethink your position?