Shepard dying never really bothered me. I think they should have included an ending where he/she lives, but I'm not one of those who needs
his Shepard to survive in order to consider it a 'happy' ending. It's all the stupidity contained in the ending that bothered me.
I wanted some varied happy endings, but was totally cool with Shepard not making it out of ME3 alive, but it had to be the shining moment of the series, had to at least be somewhere within driving distance of Spock in TWOK to be acceptable to me. With the endings as they were released, they were galaxies apart.