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Old May 1 2012, 09:36 AM   #5
lvsxy808
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Re: DS9 Season 10, ep 10x17 - "Reservoir Ferengi"

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ACT THREE


FADE IN:


37 INT. DS9 – QUARK’S BAR


VAUGHN, with the party at Quark’s going on behind him. He booms, cheerful and ebullient.

VAUGHN
LJ! And to what do I owe the
pleasure?

Vaughn stands behind the bar, turned to face the comm screen on the back wall, which features the face of Admiral AKAAR. The admiral is as stony-faced and grumpy as ever.

AKAAR (screen)
The pleasure is all yours,
Elias. I don’t especially
like being kept on hold by
a nervous Lieutenant.

Around the side of the bar, there’s a large computer panel and an arched doorway where there normally isn’t, of the type usually seen in a holosuite. At the panel are Dax, Nog and Rom all working feverishly to program on the fly. The fake Vaughn pauses, as if waiting for instructions, before replying.

VAUGHN
Well you do tend to intimidate
the junior officers, LJ. Now,
what can I do for you?

AKAAR (screen)
I’m calling to ask where
you’ve been.

Dax looks with worry to Kira, who stands to the side with VIC FONTAINE. All make sure to stay out of the admiral’s line of sight. Nervously, Kira nods for Dax to continue...

VAUGHN
What do you mean, Admiral?
I’ve been right here.

AKAAR (screen)
That’s exactly what I mean.
Why didn’t you attend the
Admirals’ Dinner Party? I
invite you every year.

Kira and Dax sag with relief. Dax continues to program... the fake Vaughn chuckles.

VAUGHN (background)
Meetings with the Bajoran First
Minister, Admiral. I don’t think
she would have thanked me for
jilting her over a dinner party.

AKAAR
(screen)
Always some excuse, Elias.

VIC
(foreground)
I won’t bother pointing out that
you threatened to switch me off
for using these things.

KIRA
Good. I’m glad you’re not going
to point that out.

Fake Vaughn gestures around to the fake party going on in the fake bar, all around him.

VAUGHN
Another state visit from another
planetary leader going on even
as we speak.
(smirk)
Really, Admiral. Insulting the
leaders of two great nations
for the sake of cocktails and
canapés?

AKAAR
(grudging)
Very well. But I had been hoping
to speak with you about the
situation with your Doctor Bashir.

VIC
(sotto)
What is it you’re doing, exactly?

KIRA
(sotto)
We need to hand-program your
copy of Vaughn for real-time
conversation, and it has to be
so good that one of his oldest
friends doesn’t realise he’s
not talking to the real thing.

Dax gulps again – the discussion of Bashir is hitting too close to home. She exchanges an uncomfortable glance with Nog, and goes back to work.

VAUGHN
What about him?

AKAAR
He was at the dinner. He seemed
a touch distracted.

VAUGHN
If the good doctor chooses to
hand in his notice and abandon
his colleagues of many years,
his actions after that are none
of my concern, Admiral. If you
want to know his mind, I suggest
you speak to him.

VIC
Where’s the real Vaughn?

KIRA
He’s not available.

VIC
Wasn’t he supposed to be at
the party...?

KIRA
He’s not available.

Kira’s tone makes it clear that Vic should not ask further. She makes a “tie this up” gesture to Dax. Dax acknowledges.

VAUGHN
If there’s nothing else, LJ,
I do have an official state
function to get back to.

AKAAR (screen)
Yes, I suppose so. But you
will attend next year, Elias.

VAUGHN
Absolutely, Admiral. You have
my solemn promise.

With a mutter of disbelief, Akaar cuts the signal. Dax sags with relief and steps back from the panel. Nog claps Rom on the shoulder in congratulation. The fake Vaughn goes still.

DAX
Do you think he bought it?

KIRA
Let’s hope. Nog, this was a
brilliant idea. Thank you so
much for your help.

NOG
You’re welcome, Captain. But –

KIRA
(cuts Nog off)
You too, Rom. It’s good to
have you on the team again.

ROM
It was fun. I’ve missed this
kind of thing.

KIRA
I know you’re both curious. But
don’t ask me why. Don’t even
think about why. It’s beyond
classified. I need you both to
put this out of your mind and
forget it ever happened.

ROM
Uhh... I can do that.

Kira and Dax share a cautious smile...


38 EXT. URWYZDEN PLANET SURFACE


A majestic, soaring shot of the same planet we saw at the top of the episode. Only this is before the war. As we glide gracefully across the landscape, we see white-topped mountains with people skiing down them, alpine chalets and lodges, glittering lakes with gently drifting tourist boats, and gleaming glass architecture that blends in smoothly and ecologically. Everything is relaxed, peaceful and beautiful. An on-screen caption says:


SIX MONTHS AGO


Over all of this, a friendly, cheerful female voice:

VOICEOVER
Welcome! ...to Urwyzden Alpha.
The three turquoise jewels of
the Urwyzden system are here
for your business... or your
pleasure.

Gradually we find the government building – the one that will be destroyed by the missile.

VOICEOVER
If you’re looking for a safe,
neutral location for all your
banking needs, the people of
Urwyzden Alpha, Beta or Gamma
will be happy to provide. And
you can be sure of that safety,
because the Urwyzden system
has never had a single armed
conflict in its entire history.
We don’t even have a military!
So come to Urwyzden today, and
let us invest in your future.

Finally passing THROUGH the window of the government building, and into...


39 INT. URWYZDEN GOVERNMENT OFFICE


A large, plush meeting room, with spectacular views of the surrounding scenery thanks to the walls entirely of glass. Three Urwyzden natives sit in a row behind a long table. They have mottled slate-grey skin, wrinkled and studded. Heads are round and bald, and they have long, pointed ears that flop over at the tips. They wear plain black suits. The middle Urwyzden, MINISTER 1, speaks proudly.

MINISTER 1
What you have heard is true.
We have never had a need of
weapons. We maintain an
attitude of strict neutrality,
even with the Romulans, the
former Dominion...

Brunt and Gaila sit opposite, again in their best suits.

BRUNT
But what about Orion pirates?
These worlds of yours are ripe
for robbers and raiders...

MINISTER 1
(sly smile)
Without naming names, gentlemen,
I suspect you will find that
many of the investors in such...
entrepreneurial endeavours trust
the Urwyzden to ensure that
their own assets remain liquid
without outside interference.

BRUNT
You mean the Orion Syndicate –

MINISTER 1
The what? I’m sorry, I must have
misheard. For a moment I thought
you were about to suggest that a
purely fictional organisation of
doubtful integrity really existed.

BRUNT
Orions in general then...

MINISTER 1
It’s certainly the case that a
number of Orion conglomerates
place funds in escrow with us.
They prefer the convenience of
not having to wait for Federation
bureaucrats to go through the
motions as they would, say,
with the Bank of Bolius.

BRUNT
And what about races with a lust
for conquest instead of profit?

MINISTER 1
A race that was truly geared for
conquest – say, the Cardassians
a few decades ago – would conquer
us in short order, yes. But the
other races, who would then be
left in difficult circumstances,
would I’m sure find it in their
interest to make things right.

Brunt’s big smile slips a notch – opportunity is slipping away. Looking to his side, Gaila seems to feel the same.

The Minister pauses to think. He jumps off his chair, and we realise that he is tiny, barely three feet tall. In fact all the Urwyzden are. The miniature Minister wanders over to the large picture windows, gazes out at the lovely view.

MINISTER 1
Nevertheless, you do bring up an
interesting point. It has been
considered in the recent past –
what with the Dominion war and
the Borg invasion – that some
orbital defence platforms might
be a wise investment. To allow
others time to recognize the
importance of their decision.

GAILA
(eager)
Oddly enough, orbital defence
platforms are our specialty.

MINISTER 1
Oddly enough, I thought they
might be.

Brunt and Gaila grin wide – it’s a deal.


40 EXT. SPACE


The Golden Handshake sits in orbit of a small uninteresting moon on the outskirts of the system – the same system seen at the top of the episode.


41 INT. GOLDEN HANDSHAKE – SHOWROOM


The entire crew – Gaila, Brunt, Pel, Bijon, Voloczin and the lead Breen LOK – are gathered in the showroom. The room is set up to display the weapons and orbital platforms they will sell to the Urwyzden. The four Ferengi have drinks in their hands and clink them together in self-congratulation.

BRUNT
Three planets, three opportun-
ities! It’s a good sale, but
a one-off. Profit is for life,
not just for the holidays.

GAILA
What if the three worlds fought
between themselves for political
control of the fiscal services?
An on-going struggle, kept at
just the right level, would make
for the perfect regular income.

BRUNT
(licks lips)
Regular...

GAILA
What you might call a private
little war, of our very own. This
calls for more than snail juice.
Volo, where’s that Romulan ale?

VOLOCZIN
I opened it half an hour ago.
Where do you think it is?

Voloczin’s fleshy tentacles flush blue, making Bijon laugh uproariously. Brunt is still a bit creeped out by him.

GAILA
Fine. We’ll bring the Ministers
Of Urwyzden Alpha, Beta and
Gamma up to the ship, in that
order, and make our pitch.

VOLOCZIN
I gave each planet’s gear a
different casing. Each bunch
are detectable by sensors we
can sell to the others.

GAILA
And what is this not going to
be, Bijon?

Everyone else turns to look at Bijon. He sags sadly.

BIJON
Another Kalani disaster.

GAILA
That’s right.

BIJON
But they were ready. I just
assumed you wouldn’t want to
keep them waiting.

BRUNT
Yes, well – you know what the
hew-mons say about “assume.”
It... puts the I in team...
or something.

GAILA
Forget the hew-mons. Lok will
make sure it all runs smoothly
this time, won’t you Lok?

The Breen rumbles a response in his electronic language. Nobody but Gaila appears to understand him.

GAILA
Exactly. Alright, let’s get to
it. Business, my friends, is
about to be booming. And booming
business is the best kind!

All but Brunt turn to leave the room.

BRUNT
I think I’ll stay a moment, and
get a feel for our products.

GAILA
You’ll enjoy them, I’m sure.

The rest of them leave. In the doorway, Pel looks over her shoulder at Brunt, who is already approaching the weapons with a hungry look in his eye. Brunt hefts one particular weapon in his hands. It feels good. He lifts it to his eye, looks through the target.


FLASHBACK – 6x10 “THE MAGNIFICENT FERENGI”


The chaos of the practise run in the holosuite, as Brunt shrieks and panics under threat of Jem’Hadar attack...


BACK TO SCENE


Brunt sneers in hatred...

BRUNT
(to self)
It was all Quark’s fault. Quark
and his entire lunatic family.


POV – TARGETING SENSOR


Looking through the targeting sensor at a circular target projected on the wall of the showroom... only it’s not a target anymore. It’s Quark’s face, smirking back at him.


BACK TO SCENE


Shivering with hatred... Brunt fires.


POV – TARGETING SENSOR


Quark’s face is blown apart by the simulated shot.


BACK TO SCENE


Brunt grins with satisfaction.

PEL (o.s.)
You’re a good shot.

Brunt turns and sees that Pel never left the room. She’s watching him, curious about him. The two of them are alone.

BRUNT
Let’s just say I have good
motivation.

PEL
I don’t like those Breen that
Gaila has taken up with.

BRUNT
I know what you mean. At least
with a Jem’Hadar, you could
see his face.

PEL
You’ve met Jem’Hadar? I’m
impressed. What did they do?

BRUNT
They... They died.

PEL
So the famous Liquidator does
have lobes after all. What do
you know about the Urwyzden?

BRUNT
More than Gaila does.

PEL
From when you were in the FCA?

BRUNT
Just because they fired me
doesn’t mean I have to give up
all my hard-earned information.
Like about the lobeless Ferengi
who deposit their own profit
with the Urwyzden.

PEL
Offworld banking? There are
Ferengi who do that? But...
But that’s illegal!

BRUNT
And the law is the law... no
matter how stupid it is. We
should be proud to uphold it.
Otherwise you... wouldn’t be
wearing those clothes.

They’re actually flirting, intrigued with each other.

BRUNT
We should keep out of the way
of those Breen. I don’t like
the way they look at me.

PEL
I don’t like the way they look
at anyone except for Gaila and
Voloczin. I especially don’t
like the way they look at
people talking together.

BRUNT
(smirk)
Then we shouldn’t let them see
us talking.

Brunt is all smooth and suave, Pel is almost giggling...


42 INT. GOLDEN HANDSHAKE – BRIDGE


A screen somewhere at the back of the small bridge shows the showroom, and the conversation between Brunt and Pel. The sound is off, but the flirting between them is clear.

WIDEN to reveal Lok, the Breen commander, watching them...


FADE OUT:


END OF ACT THREE


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