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Old April 2 2012, 04:02 PM   #565
Guy Gardener
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Re: Why was Kes written off the show?

spot_loves_data wrote: View Post
I was tempted to say you pulled that out of your ass, the one over the tea kettle, but it's starting to sound familiar. It's been a while since I've seen that episode.

That's a seriously massive fuck up on the part of the Nacene. Too bad they didn't have a genesis device. Or the means to just relocate everyone.
Sigh.

Love Unlimited. s02e12.

Original air date january 18th 1999.

Ally gives their side's closing argument, during which Greg comes into the courtroom. I give it to you here in its entirety:
"That's just dumb," Ally says. "Would dumb be the legal definition?" the judge asks. "Your honor, if you look at alimony and palimony it comes down to fairness. And, whatever his problems which couldn't be kept in check, much less in his pants, she endured it for nine years. She's taken care of the children." The judge interrupts. "The problem, counsel, is that the fairness issue presupposes a valid union. Here, technically, it might have been invalid." Ally says again, "And that's dumb." "We're back to legal definitions," the judge says. "If we're really going to go down that road and hold up marriage ceremonies to standards of sanity -- watch out," Ally says. "People run off to Las Vegas on their first dates. Some listen to their astrologers. So many people make terrible, horrendous decisions out of passion and we still enforce those marriage contracts." "There is a difference," the judge says, "between recklessness and insanity." "Oh, he wasn't insane," Ally says. "He knew what he was doing even if he was being led by little Mr. Helmet Head." "Mr. Helmet Head?" the judge says. "Love by definition is crazy," Ally says. "'I'm crazy about him,' 'He's mad about her.' People get blinded by love. They fall, ass over teakettle. What does that expression even mean 'ass over teakettle'? It's nonsensical. But we excuse it because if it's about love, fine. Love doesn't make sense. People fall in love for all sorts of insanities and we don't legislate the reasons. But once they take vows, once they get that legal piece of paper and once they start having kids, we take that seriously, and we call it an institution. And for this man to be running around vaccinating any woman he can convince to play doctor -- for this man to indulge his little affliction at the expense of his wife and his children -- for this man to skirt financial and moral responsibility because he found a skuzzy lawyer and a skuzzier shrink to pronounce him disabled – for this man to waltz into a court and get an order saying that this woman was never married when she led an exemplary married life – for this man to say that he's addicted to love, addicted to sex, addicted to infidelity, lying and cheating – for this man to come in here parading his penis like he should qualify for handicapped parking." Ally turns to look at the husband. "How dare you subject this woman to this embarrassment -- how dare you subject your kids to it -- how dare you live, you giant ass." Spectators in the courtroom start clapping.
One breath.

Calista said all that, with just a single set of lungs air capacity.

Han Solo is a very lucky geriatric.
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