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Old March 20 2012, 11:42 PM   #151
stj
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Re: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter produced by Tim Burton in the work

All those scenes of Walker playing with his axe are silly, so silly one wishes for John Wilkes Booth to show up and pull out a gun a la Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Our American Cousin would finally get the punch line it deserves.

The fucking axe is being treated like Wolverine's claws. Just as Wolvie's little soldiers have to keep erecting themselves, to thrill and delight the audience, Lincoln's axe has to keep rising to the occasion...over and over and over and over. Wolverine's sexiness would be at an end if the claws weren't retractable. Lincoln's axe wouldn't be so thrilling if it just chopped. The way the studio tries to sell this tripe with a clown waving a phallic symbol around is quite annoying because it really does insult our intelligence.

Getting all excited about getting called on it is certainly one's prerogative. What isn't one's prerogative is thinking no one has a right to get annoyed by the smell of shit, which, lest we forget, is precisely what this trailer dumped out onto our screens. Who knew pixels had an odor? We live in an age of miracles. But it merely takes a simple douche to get all self-righteous about not liking a damn commercial.

Covertly counterposing sexy masculinity to (unspoken subtext=unmasculine, to put it generously) prettiness has far more to do with sexual ideology than sexual preference, straight, gay or bisexual.
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