As for that particular decision, though, I understand why. That involves the lives of civilians, and specifically the children of someone I think by now is a friend of his. And after what happened to Jarol's children, I think he has good reason to be sensitive about that. Especially
with spatial anomalies (which damaged Dorak's ship) and angry Klingons in the neighborhood.
But with as strong of a personality as Jarol has, it is very important for her to say out loud
and to be consistent in her actions, in showing Laran that she does not expect him to be her clone, or else Colissa's fear for Laran could come true. (That he could end up "terrified" of coming out from under Jarol's shadow.)