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Old September 30 2010, 10:49 AM   #186
Gibraltar
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Re: Star Trek: Restoration - Onyx

Feedback on Chapter 18

Both Groves and Benjamani demonstrate some survival skills and instincts as their diplomatic mission quickly devolves into an armed confrontation both on the station and in the surrounding space.

Prinís holding her own in the battle, at least for the moment. Kane may be busy, but 10 minutes? Really? Iím thinking this battle will be long over in 10 minutes.

Turnerís as gutsy as they come, especially when leading her people into the combat meat-grinder outside Restoration, where her fighters are grossly outnumbered. I liked her brief thought regarding Sarine, a testament to how close sheís getting to him, despite just having met the man.

Meanwhile, Qwertís having his own grand time on board the station, but finds some relief in the form of an unexpected ally, LilíKim.

Terrific stuff here, CaptainSarine. Youíve got a lot of balls in play, but youíre keeping them all airborne with a deft hand and a nicely flowing narrative.
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