Sarek of Vulcan wrote:
After getting some sleep, I do feel a bit better today. I put on a little Oasis - "What's the Story, Morning Glory?" and felt better, too. I wish I could control some of these plummets in my mood. I do work to maintain a positive attitude, but sometimes it all just crumbles away, and then I feel terrible.
To me, this sounds like you're just trying to control the symptoms rather than trying to find the cure. Kestra's
idea of moving forward in other areas is a great one. Keep trying to find a job, but try to move forward in other areas.
Mr Awe wrote:
Seriously, great attitude Kestra! I think that is perfect and kudos to you! There's nothing more powerful than a person who knows what they want and how they can get it. The great thing is that you've already positioned yourself for this change, you're doing it. Much better than sitting around moping about it while time goes by.
Heh, thanks. It's been a big boost to my self-esteem in an unexpected way. I feel intelligent and capable in ways I didn't before. I think sometimes it's about a combination of things, doing something when you're ready to and not when you're forced to.
I have added a constant undercurrent of anxiety about getting into graduate school, but I try to tell myself I'll deal with that when the time comes.
Back in my academic days, I've did some research into the predictors of graduate level academic success for a large scholarship program (I was helping to redesign their selection criteria). The biggest predictors were not the typical academic measures like the GRE, but basically any measure of persistence and perserverance. These personality traits translate to academic success much better than academic measures!
And, from all appearances, you've got large amounts of these traits!! So, I wouldn't be worried. Stay dedicated and passionate about what you're doing and you'll be just fine.