This may have been posted before, but I just stumbled across it and found it amusing. (Contains swearing.)
"Peter Kay's Britain's Got the Pop Factor... and Possibly a New Celebrity Jesus Christ Soapstar Superstar Strictly on Ice" FTW.
(Is that thing on DVD yet?)
: It's mindless now, clicking towards oblivion. ... How long, K-9?
: INSUFFICIENT DATA.
: Yeah, you never fucking know the answer when it's important.