This is getting ridiculous. If Star Trek can present a single timeline that goes ENT-TOS-TNG-etc, say TOS all takes place in one universe (despite huge contradictions), then the Kelvin can happily fit between ENT and TOS.
The Kelvin looks they way it does because they updated the TOS look for a modern movie. It's big becuase the script required 800 survivors. If you can't accept these things and move on I'm suprised you survived the needless changes made in TMP, let alone Enterprise. Nonetheless, just like has happened since TOS, fans can make up excuses for every gaff, changed premise and outright contradiction if they want to.
I get that you don't want this film to hurt or make you re-evaluate your TOS worldview, but guess what? It's done. You don't like it? Fine - ignore it. End of story. Trying to "prove" to everyone your fanon viewpoint is the correct one using more and more obscure reasoning ("sharp edged saucer"?) is a waste.
Unfortunately, the same can be said of those who embrace the abramsverse as the "new Trek" and try to discount the (sometimes) legitimate claims of those of us who don't share their opinions. Those who approve of the abramsverse and the (quite obvious) changes made to the TOS universe by JJA attemp to discount the claims from the other camp by simply saying things like "but guess what? It's done. You don't like it? Fine - ignore it. End of story", or something to that effect. And that's fine. However, those of us who would rather have our Star Trek the way it was instead of trying to force feed us this new alternate universe BS, prefer to actually give reasons for our arguments instead of just saying "I don't like this or that because it all sucks so get over it!" or something to that effect. Telling people that they need to get over it, or that it's done and there's nothing you can do about it, etc. etc. doesn't help the situation. So what if the discussion goes round in circles? That's what a discussion board is for. Discussion. One side is not going to change the other's opoinion. But that doesn't mean that the "haters", or "canonists" as we're often called, don't have a right to voice our opinions as well as the gushers do.