How the hell did Hank Pym not make that list?!
He did. Click the "Next" button for page 2 of the list.
Everyone keeps beating the Hank Pym drum.
Well, not every
one. But it seems like it from time to time. When it was revealed back in Avengers #395 that Pym's mental breakdowns were in fact caused by Kang the Conqueror. Kang was trying to twist Pym into his lackey with subtle pushes over time, and Pym resisted his efforts but at the cost of his mental health. So Kang turned his efforts over to his second choice: Tony Stark.
Yes, I know it comes from the horrible "The Crossing" story. But the explanation IS still in continuity. But I doubt that Bendis and the rest of Quesada's good ol' boys club ever bothered to research the books they take over. If they did, we wouldn't have had recent stories like Peter Parker getting drunk at his aunt's wedding. When it has been a long established fact that Peter does not drink. Alcohol combined with spider-powers equals someone maybe getting hurt, so the responsible thing to do is to abstain. But then, that would be Responsible Peter, not the Pathetic Peter currently in mainstream Marvel.