Gosh, what a great news day! Both the soap opera clubs of the world have put out some excellent news - Newcastle hire Chris Hughton permanently, take the club off the market and float the idea of selling the naming rights for St James' Park, and Real Madrid get beaten by the Spanish equivalent of a League One side, Alcoron. Not just a 'cupset' either, but a proper humiliation, 4-0.
What a brilliant day. I think Newcastle will definitely be closer to relegation than promotion now - I always said they'd be in trouble if they didn't sort themselves out by November and this isn't what I'd call 'sorting themselves out'. And Madrid... well, what can be said about them? Does anyone not love seeing them crash and burn?