Nerys Ghemor wrote:
I hated Miles O'Brien's relationship with Keiko. She was whiny, rude and constantly disrespectful. Before somebody jumps me about saying "a woman should respect her man", that is not what I mean by that at all. I mean that in a good marriage, there is mutual respect. Keiko talked to Miles as though he were a five year old, and for a reason I can't fathom, he just took it. She knew she was marrying a Starfleet engineer when she got into that relationship. Harping and nagging on him about her career needs not getting met was just stupid, considering she made that decision.
Exactly. If a man acted the way Keiko did, was verbally abusive in that fashion, we'd be telling the woman to get out of the relationship. But because she's doing it, it's acceptable? Nope.
As for Miles just taking it...truth is, I think he had a very uncomplaining personality I think that with her verbal abuse, she took advantage of it. To me, his behavior was very, VERY much like a woman who cannot bring herself to leave that sort of relationship. I think a lot of the comments he made to Bashir, and the time that he spent with him, was VERY telling. He took refuge
in that friendship.
I disagree with your assertion that Keiko was verbally abusive. I never saw it like that. I think they loved each other a hell of a lot, and they had Molly and Kirayoshi to think about - they had their problems, but as Vulcan Princess
says, they stuck at it. Miles is a family man, and Keiko loves her husband and her children. They both care about their careers, and yes Miles is a Starfleet engineer, but why should his career take priority? I think Keiko made a lot of sacrifices, and sometimes found it hard to deal with. I think Miles may have used his friendship with Julian to escape the odd hostile atmosphere, but I think Keiko struggles sometimes because she was left to look after the kids while he was gallivanting around the Alamo - I don't think she had a friendship like that to take refuge in when she
needed to get away. I think they're a realistic couple, I think things can be very difficult in real life, and I think that love wins through in the end. She might be 'whiny' or whatever, but some people are like that, some people can't help being negative, and some people don't express themselves in the most constructive way. I don't believe Miles "just took it", I believe he understands her and the way she communicates. And that's why they're together for such a long time.