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Old March 19 2009, 07:30 PM   #270
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Location: Ireland
Re: A Hater Revisits Voyager

Elogium (˝)

Let's talk about Kes baby,
let's talk about her and Nee(lix).
Let's talk about all the bad things,
and the very bad things,
they did in (prod no.) 118.
Let's talk about Kes.

The severe logical errors really ruin this episode, and it doesn't help that it is so boring that my mind kept on dwelling on the logical errors rather than what was actually going on. Now I'm no expert on sex... wait, let me rephrase that. I'm no biology professor, but I do know that sex is supposed to be fun and that it is supposed to be so easy that animals, or teenagers who dropped out of high-school and are addicted to meth, know how to do it. You put the thing in there, you wiggle around for 30 seconds and you're done. That's right, I know how the ladies like it.

If sex could only be performed once, it involved a sweaty woman bloated from eating beetles, two hours of foot rubbing, a few days of bonding, hand pus and abnormal back growths... I would probably give it a pass. The pr0n industry on Ocampa must really suffer.

I'm not even going to bring up the fact that population growth for Ocampan's is less than 0.5, I figured that out when I first saw this episode aged 9. If a 9 year-old can see such a glaring logical problem then how can professional writers not? At least the writers for this episode would never get a chance to work on this show again.

(Jeri Taylor: show runner during seasons 3 & 4, Kenneth Biller: show runner during season 7.)

Those of you who follow sfdebris' great reviews know about his Stupid Neelix Moments™, and I couldn't stop thinking about those when I was watching this episode. His character was so insufferable that I consider this whole episode to be a stupid Neelix moment because it is impossible to pick just one moment from this episode.

Then there is the plot with the aliens flying all about the ship. I miss Picard because he would have just shot the bastards and be done with it, instead we get boring suspense which at least took us away from the Kes/Neelix story-line. And this is the 24th century, so why does Chakotay act like Mary Whitehouse when it comes to sex?

I just watched Futurama's The Beast With a Billion Backs last night, if you want to watch some sci-fi sex with weird aliens then I would strongly suggest you watch that over Elogium because it probably makes more sense.

Worst episode yet.
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