it's more the fact that it's only in recent books that I feel a big deal has been made out of 'second officers' (whereas I'd say it's more important what their actual 'job' is, like Data at ops).
You're welcome to that feeling, of course, but I don't think it's supported by evidence. And second officer was always
Data's position on board, and it was repeatedly stated as thus.
That said, to be honest, none of that has ever really been at the heart of my problem with Miranda. I haven't liked her since she first appeared in this relaunch (Resistance? Q&A?), and that was before the 'incident' above. Part of it is that I don't agree with her life choice. She's choosing to leave behind her family of husband, 1-year-old twins, and a 5-year-old so that she can be second officer on the Enterprise.
Have you read the S.C.E.
series? If so, did you have the same problem with Captain Gold, who has had many many more kids during a long career in Starfleet? And, as Christopher pointed out, Vicenzo and the kids could've come onto the Big E, but Vicenzo didn't want to give up his career, either.
It is my considered opinion that if Miranda was a male character, nobody would even be commenting
on "leaving the kids behind." And in fact nobody has ever
said that about David Gold, who left his wife to raise a lot more children than Miranda Kadohata did her husband. But because she's a woman, it becomes an issue -- which, to be honest, is why I set up the character the way I did, to challenge the expectations. (She first appeared in Q & A
, and the character was my creation.)