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Old November 28 2008, 12:49 AM   #21
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Location: The Fifth Dimension
Re: November Contest Entry: Sacrifice (PG-13)

Good work. It reminded me of something Spencer Tracy's character says toward the end of Judgment at Nuremberg:

There are those in our country today, too, who speak of the "protection" of the country. Of "survival". The answer to that is: *survival as what*?
Sometimes, mere survival is not sufficient. Is life worth living without freedom, without dignity? From my admittedly non-spiritual perspective, this is the story of a man who decides that it's better to die on his feet than to live on his knees.

The alternate universe you describe is fascinating, and I was both surprised and pleased to discover the main character's identity toward the end.

The only criticism I have to offer is that the story consists almost entirely of backfill: instead of showing us what happened to bring the main characters to this pass, you tell us. I think your story would have been even more effective if you had found some way to show instead of tell.
An illusion--with intelligence! A malignant vision, with a will of pure evil!
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