I have simple requests.
1) Kari Byron.
2) Assorted lengths of rope that have nothing to do with first entry on this list. Nope.
3) A promise from Arsene Wenger that he will spend at least £40m on new players over the age of 25 in January 2009.
In all seriousness, though, I don't really like the receiving presents part of Christmas. I'd just like people to not spend their money on me. All they have to give me is two weeks of the kind of peace and quiet I don't get while I'm at work.