you switched from past to present tense in there. y'might wanna fix that...
Where's the tense shift? I didn't notice it.
There's a fantastic pace to this story, USS Fardell
, unfortunately that's also made it a bit confusing for me, I shall have to go back and read it again!
I would have like to see what state the freighter's crew were in and got to hear some of their stories - I think without that, the story leaves too much unexplained.