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Old October 1 2008, 03:11 AM   #63
Gojirob
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Re: Continuity Nazis: Your own personal canon.

TheBolianChef wrote: View Post
Admiral_Young wrote: View Post
I can't believe no one has retconned Norman's kids with Gwen yet!
I did! you people just ignore me

Wait, that might have been in the other Spider - Man thread.

I don't mind JMS as badly as many people do.

I hated Ezekial and the Others so badly. I think that's where Spider - Man really dropped off.
See, I think the whole Ezekiel/Totem thing could have been used to achieve OMD/BND w/o Mephisto. Ezekiel appears and tells Peter his life is, natch, one big web. He hates how the web has weaved, so E tells him to pull it apart and spin a new one. Two problems : One, once he does this, the mystic stuff will leave his life forever (heh) and Two, not being all trans-cosmic, Peter has no idea how the new web will look or how it will be structured. His efforts to save May and undo the unmasking have most of the consequences of Brand New Day, but without the hero preening before the devil himself, and leaving an in-story chance that he and MJ will eventually get back together. An unmanned Predator drone then finds an unshaven Joe Quesada, and mistakes him for an image in its data banks.

Wackiness ensues.

"Duhhhhh--Pete is that friend who drives everyone crazy, cause he's so undependable. Ah-huck, ah-huh."

BTW, do you think the other demons mocked on Mephisto when he got back from OMD?

Demon : Master, you have triumphed! Spider-Man's heroic soul is yours.

M : Uhm, No. Didn't quite get his soul. Really, its a funny story...

D : Then, you have the soul of his beloved Mary Jane? Another love he couldn't save, what torture!

M : Well, No. But I did make several whispered side-deals with her, and...

D : Then the innocent Aunt May is ours?

M : Nottt realllly. Her being alive was one of the big terms.

D : Ahhh, but you replaced May Parker with one of us, right?

M :Looking back, that might have been an idea, but again, No.

D : Jameson? Robbie? Flash Thompson? Debra FREAKING Whitman?

M : No on those too.

D : What did you get out of this?

M : My ancient enemy above us...

D : You mean God.

M : My sworn foe in the struggles for men's tender souls...

D : ....in other words, God.

M : The one whose light I give meaning by my shadow...

D : You can say God, you know. We're already in Hell.

M : He who cast me out...

D : You're the devil, so that would be.....GOD!!! What are you afraid of, blasphemy? Too late.

M : I have grievously wounded him by undoing the union between the Young Parkers--and restoring Harry, and introducing a bunch of weirdos no one's ever heard of, and making Peter an idiot slacker...

D : Are they eternally tormented by the memory of what they lost?

M : Some smallest part of them remembers.

D : That's...not quite eternal torment.

M : Wait til all the oblique comments about the past timeline are made! It will be HELL!!

(Demon stalks off, points to a figure on a larger throne behind Mephisto)

D : Quesada - YOU'RE JUST EVIL!!!!
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