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-   -   TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness! (http://www.trekbbs.com/showthread.php?t=212005)

LeadHead May 8 2013 05:28 AM

TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
Hello everyone! Thanks for bearing with me with my extremely unreasonable schedule recently. The good news is that things will start improving soon, the bad news is that there might be a couple of rough weeks before it does.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...gedWinners.jpg

First up to the plate, we have the "Get me outta here" Award, going to:

Quote:

R. Star wrote: (Post 7989295)
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption136a.jpg

Picard: Her.
Riker: Acknowledged, sir. Ensign Ro, you'll join me, Data and Worf on the hostile planet.
Ro: Can I resign now, sir?

Next, we have the "Alpha Beta" Award, going to:

Quote:

Mr. Laser Beam wrote: (Post 7985986)
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption136b.jpg

Riker: What have you found?

Geordi: Nothing yet. But these lights keep blinking out of sequence.

Riker: Well, get them to blink IN sequence!


Next, we have the "Here comes the Starship Gossip" Award, going to:

Quote:

Finn wrote: (Post 8009596)
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption136c.jpg

*silence*

Worf: Captain?

Picard: I'm going to be in the ready room. You have the bridge, Mr. Worf. If you hear some sobbing and banging noises coming from the ready room, don't come in until I ask you to.

Worf: You finally had the talk with the Doctor, didn't you?


Next, we have the "Swamp Forcefields" Award, going to:

Quote:

Triskelion wrote: (Post 7987840)
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption136d.jpg

O'Brien:
One day, lad, all this will be yours!
Data: What, the force fields?
O'Brien: No, not the force fields, lad.


Next, we have the "In the year 2369..." Award, going to:

Quote:

Nerys Myk wrote: (Post 7978144)
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption136e.jpg

PICARD: Conan, we wanted to let you know that Leno is actually leaving this time....


Our Photoshop award, goes to:

Quote:

bullethead wrote: (Post 7978189)
http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/j...screentest.jpg
Deep in the recesses of Paramount's studios, a cabal of executives are responsible for approving and vetoing the TNG creative staff's ideas. Today's topic: whether Data should wear a red shirt.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...s/Jean-Luc.jpg

Quote:

Dr. Crusher wrote: (Post 7993084)
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption136c.jpg

Captain's Log, Supplemental: Newest policy: Away team candidates will be identified by the successful completion of a game of "Red Light, Green Light" before entering the bridge turbolift. An unanticipated consequence has been the regular elimination of necessary "red shirts" through this process. Will reconsider policy.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...LaughAward.jpg

Quote:

JirinPanthosa wrote: (Post 8003368)
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption136e.jpg

Picard: We've decided to let you go, if you promise not to tell anyone we were saved by Wesley again.

Many thanks to everyone who participated and congratulations to all of our winners!

Thanks again for all the patience you've been giving me recently. Life has been crazy busy for yours truly, I look forward to it calming down soon, just gotta get to that point.

And now, lets get back to the blu-rays!


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137c.jpg

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

Enjoy!

LeadHead May 8 2013 05:34 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Picard: And so, Starfleet said that if you want to ever advance, you should grow a beard...

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Computer: Warning: Laughing Gas has been released in this area.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137c.jpg

Picard: Wait! That's the dishwashing liquid!

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Gomez: I met a Ferengi who thought you were awesome, named Daimon Bok. So I gave him the itinerary for your next shore leave.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

Worf: If you are trying to distract me- YOWZA! I mean, it won't work.

Nerys Myk May 8 2013 05:44 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

PICARD: And how about that new Counselor, I'd like to show her my French Tickler. Know what I mean?

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PICARD: Save some for me. I have to spend the next two hours with her!

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GOMEZ: It just appeared over my head out of the blue!

LAFORGE: Hmmm, looks like we crossed the transporter with the replicator again.

Triskelion May 8 2013 07:32 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
TFTW LeadHead!

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Picard: And then I said, "Wassa matta, you no lika my cannoli?"

Riker:
And then what happened?

Picard:
I gave up mob movie auditions and took up the Shakespeare. "Wassa matta, to die is to be banish'd from myself over here!"


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

Troi: Could you imagine! That pudgy old bearded guy was hitting on me! Me!
Yar: Like anyone would ever settle! Let's stay young forever!
Troi: We will!


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137c.jpg

Picard: If you could just let me have my comb.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Picard: Chocolate milk?
Gomez: It was my first porn with, you know - a bl - a blind guy.


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K'Ehleyr: I see you found my filmography.
Worf: Yeah - I was searching for Klingon Asteroid Blasters.
K'Ehleyr: Happens all the time.

inflatabledalek May 8 2013 08:32 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Picard: Aw, so having to take the time to tutor Wesley is eating into you sex life? Here's the world's tinniest violin.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

Yar: Damn... invisible... tickling... aliens...


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Captain's Log Stardate 41831.6: I suspect Mr. Homm is regretting agreeing to the Enterprise drinking game of downing the bottle everytime Wesley saves the ship.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Picard: Well, at least it covers the urine.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

Leadhead: Right, time to start the new caption contest, and this time I'm not going to let anything distra.... Ohhhhhhh, hello.

GameOn May 8 2013 08:53 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Picard: Ensign, you make me wish I was Edosian.

R. Star May 8 2013 09:12 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
Thanks for the win, LeadHead!

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Picard: That's right, Number One. I have what you want and it's right here in my hand.
Riker: A fourth pip?
Picard: No, a condom. Use it. That's how Wesl-- erm. Just use it. Trust me.... what?

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Gossip soon spread around the ship's ladies after Geordi's last physical. It seemed his blindness wasn't his only handicap.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137c.jpg

Picard: Erm... hell, I'd get plastered every day too if I was her body servant.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Picard: Rub the hot chocolate off my uniform Ensign.... lower.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

Kheylar: Worf... your comic book super heroine fetish is getting out of hand.

Finn May 8 2013 11:05 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
Thanks for the win!


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

Deanna: I told you! That happens every time Wil steps out of the pool!

Jonas Grumby May 8 2013 04:41 PM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Stewart: "Just think, Jon! If our series ever switches to movies like the original series did, they'll surely concentrate on the action hero character, and you'll be in the catbird seat!"


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Gomez: "You're right, Captain. Taking Commander LaForge with me to my quarters to help me change my uniform would be unprofessional. Thank you for setting me straight, sir. It's lucky we happened to run into you on the way there!"
LaForge (thinking): "Why, God, why? Was I Kodos the Executioner in a past life or something?"


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

Worf: "Nope. Nice try, but I want the full Wonder Woman getup."

Gary7 May 8 2013 05:16 PM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Picard: "As my first officer, I'm trusting that I can count on you with discretion. Can you keep a secret?"
Riker: "You got it, Captain. So... what is it?"
Picard: "I'm greatly intimidated by men with beards."


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

Lt. Yar: "Whose are bigger? Hahahahahaha--that Wesley, always so curious about everything. OK Deana, you can stop looking at them now..."

bullethead May 8 2013 07:12 PM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg
Picard: Number One, the key to having a beard in Starfleet is making sure you don't have a duplicate before growing a goatee. Whoever has the goatee is evil and will be shot on sight.
Riker: Don't worry sir, I'm one of a kind... but I'll go with a full beard just in case.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg
Today's topic in The Wesley Shaming Session: his inability to hide being aroused by every attractive woman on the ship.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137c.jpg
Captain's Log, supplemental: Mr. Hohm has consumed the ship's entire supply of alcohol. Unfortunately, the crew cannot tolerate Lwaxanna Troi's presence without it; I fear a mutiny will soon brew if Mr. La Forge and Commander Riker cannot get the still operating.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg
Geordi learned long ago that looking up at the ceiling during an embarrassing incident was the best way to avoid a superior's wrath.

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg
Kheylar forgot Rule Number 1 of Dating a Nerd: Never make going out seem like a chore, otherwise your partner will stick to their job/hobbies.

Jonas Grumby May 8 2013 07:33 PM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Picard: "You'd better get out of that wet uniform, Ensign."
Gomez: Oh dear! They warned us about this in that special seminar at Starfleet Academy!"

Holdfast May 8 2013 07:33 PM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
Good to see the contests are still going; hope life settles down for you soon LeadHead.



http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

PICARD: If you want access to Troi's secret surveillance video, it'll cost you.



http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

YAR: Fully-functional? Girl, he wasn't even close!



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PICARD: That's Windex.



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PICARD: Fix the holodeck, Mr LaForge. Judging by the state of her, this must be the final scene of one of your holoporn programmes.
LAFORGE looks away, whistling innocently



http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

K'EHLYER: The difference between you and me is that I make figure-hugging spandex look good.

Triskelion May 8 2013 11:00 PM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Do you know what this is?
It looks like - a pube, sir?
A ginger pube, Number One.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

Yar: And then - Soong programmed him to weep afterward!


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137c.jpg

Wait, I didn't add the roofies yet.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Gomez: A woman walked into engineering, and LaForge spewed, sir.
Picard: I figured.


http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

K'Ehleyr: I'm sick of playing TSA vs Disgruntled Businesswoman. Can't we just make out?

Mojochi May 9 2013 01:24 AM

Re: TNG Caption This! 313: Extreme Tardiness!
 
http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137a.jpg

Picard: Mot's manicures are great, yes, & his pedicures are marvelous too, but it's the Brazilian waxing that keeps me coming back

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137b.jpg

Yar: Then I asked him if Soong made it detachable

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137c.jpg

Picard: Merde... I better hide the wine

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137d.jpg

Geordi: Dammit! I just got this job & just met this girl. You are a cruel vindictive god, Damn you!

http://i183.photobucket.com/albums/x...aption137e.jpg

Worf: Joan Jett called. She wants her outfit back

K'Ehleyr: Said the guy wearing a sash


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