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-   -   I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil (http://www.trekbbs.com/showthread.php?t=112887)

Locutus of Bored January 19 2010 10:39 PM

I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
I am now reaping what I sowed for asking for The Dark One's assistance in saving the city of Huntington Beach, California from an invasion of his demon hordes; namely Twilight-loving tweens.

As a result of my pact with Satan, the Lord is punishing Huntington Beach with tornado warnings (sea spouts were already spotted off the coast), monsoon winds and rain, lightning, hail, and some flooding. Some nearby stores have had their ceilings collapse in places.

The worst part was not being able to access the internet for several hours earlier in the day due to a power outage. FORGIVE ME LORD. I'll never use that Team Edward doll as a voodoo doll ever again, I promise.

The main part of the storm has just moved on, but there's supposed to be a worse storm coming tomorrow. So-called "scientists" are trying to say that this is all caused by El Niņo, but what do they know?

So, as a byproduct of my new-found righteousness, I give this topic to you, the TrekBBS faithful, to confess any pacts with the devil you might have made for your own benefit that had the opposite effect in the long run. If there is any bad weather or random drama you want to blame on the Lord punishing you, this is the place to do it.

Trekker4747 January 19 2010 10:51 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
I made a pact with the devil once to give me a green-light when I was rushing to KFC to get dinner. God punished me with a dry wetnap. :(

Miss Chicken January 19 2010 10:58 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
I have never made a pact with the Devil. I don't even know hw to get in contact with him. Does he have a phone number, or do I have to summon him via some strange ritual?

Lindley January 19 2010 10:59 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
^Why not just email him?

I heard about someone else who made a deal.....


Miss Chicken January 19 2010 11:01 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
OK what is his email address. I assume he used Hotmail.

ShamelessMcBundy January 19 2010 11:01 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
I'd sell my soul for a Formula 1 racing car.

Locutus of Bored January 19 2010 11:26 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
Quote:

Miss Chicken wrote: (Post 3768729)
I have never made a pact with the Devil. I don't even know hw to get in contact with him. Does he have a phone number, or do I have to summon him via some strange ritual?

The number of the Beast is:

1-666-LDI-ABLO (phone)
1-666-THE-DRK1 (fax)

No solicitors please, Hell is already full of those guys.

Or you can email him at www.IMBLLLzebub2@hotmail.com

ManOnTheWave January 19 2010 11:38 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
Quote:

Lindley wrote: (Post 3768735)
^Why not just email him?

I heard about someone else who made a deal.....

Oh, I get it. He sold his soul for the box and ended up with Megan Fox. Horrible.

RobertVA January 19 2010 11:42 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
Quote:

Locutus of Bored wrote: (Post 3768805)
(snip)
No solicitors please, Hell is already full of those guys.
(snip)

Just more reason to annoy them.

Nobody claimed hell would be a picnic!

Trekker4747 January 19 2010 11:42 PM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
I hear the Devil plans on getting onto Twitter, but he's always busy with his farm on Farmville to bother with it.

1001001 January 20 2010 12:41 AM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
Quote:

Locutus of Bored wrote: (Post 3768675)
I am now reaping what I sowed for asking for The Dark One's assistance in saving the city of Huntington Beach, California from an invasion of his demon hordes; namely Twilight-loving tweens.

As a result of my pact with Satan, the Lord is punishing Huntington Beach with tornado warnings (sea spouts were already spotted off the coast), monsoon winds and rain, lightning, hail, and some flooding. Some nearby stores have had their ceilings collapse in places.

The worst part was not being able to access the internet for several hours earlier in the day due to a power outage. FORGIVE ME LORD. I'll never use that Team Edward doll as a voodoo doll ever again, I promise.

The main part of the storm has just moved on, but there's supposed to be a worse storm coming tomorrow. So-called "scientists" are trying to say that this is all caused by El Niņo, but what do they know?

Don't worry.

Obama will send aid and then turn it into a political issue, just to improve his standing with his fellow beach combers.

Miss Chicken January 20 2010 12:57 AM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
Quote:

Locutus of Bored wrote: (Post 3768805)
Quote:

Miss Chicken wrote: (Post 3768729)
I have never made a pact with the Devil. I don't even know hw to get in contact with him. Does he have a phone number, or do I have to summon him via some strange ritual?

The number of the Beast is:

1-666-LDI-ABLO (phone)
1-666-THE-DRK1 (fax)

No solicitors please, Hell is already full of those guys.

Or you can email him at www.IMBLLLzebub2@hotmail.com

I tried to phone him but I was put on hold with only muzak to listen to. A voice eventually announced that I was 7656th in the queue so I gave up.

I think that muzak was invented by the devil.

I emailed him but I am yet to received I reply.

Lindley January 20 2010 01:00 AM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v3...ey/970825a.gif

Misfit Toy January 20 2010 01:32 AM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
Quote:

Locutus of Bored wrote: (Post 3768805)

Or you can email him at www.IMBLLLzebub2@hotmail.com

BLLLzebub2??

Who was BLLLzebub1?

trampledamage January 20 2010 01:34 AM

Re: I Made a Voodoo Pact with the Devil
 
Quote:

Misfit Toy wrote: (Post 3769224)
Quote:

Locutus of Bored wrote: (Post 3768805)

Or you can email him at www.IMBLLLzebub2@hotmail.com

BLLLzebub2??

Who was BLLLzebub1?

That's his private e-mail for the family.


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