Movie Caption Contest #85: Just for Laughs

If tricking the Klingons failed, Uhura's fallback plan was to send Scotty over to "accidentally brush into them".

 

DEANNA:"Two girls...one cup?"

WILL:"Now, now...YOU look at worse."




UHURA:"Can you believe the NERVE of that guy?

First he says cord A connects to socket 4...then he says cord 4 goes into socket A!

This is the last time we buy Sanyo shit."

 

SCOTTY:"What's so funny, lads?

Wha...

Why...ye bloody got RICK ROLLED by the Klingons!!"

 

NICHOLS: No seriously, this is the actual script!

 

If tricking the Klingons failed, Uhura's fallback plan was to recite the seven things you couldn't say on television:
G'nark
Pa'vreek
Kuluhn
M'retk
Varusht
Ke'lem
and Ann Coulter

 

You know you've hit pay-dirt when you find a woman who likes watching the same Internet porn that you do.

 

Riker: A "Menage a Doctor" it is.
Troi: Really? I would think you would have gone for the "Menage a Troi" line. I mean, it's glaringly obvious.
Riker: Oh, I didn't think of that.
Troi: What are you some kind of moronic force of nature?
Riker: Hey, save the humiliation for when Doctor Crusher gets here.

 

Riker: ... and then the Ferengi in the guerilla suit says to Picard, "No, but I didn't think you'd put it there!"
...
So, what do you think of my entry in the caption contest?
...
Deanna?

Troi: It's nice, Will, just not my kind of humor.
How I could be involved with a man who has absolutely no sense of humor...

Riker: I heard that!

 

"AIG stock, Will?

Even after more than three centuries you'd be a complete idiot to do it."

 

UHURA:"Oh, no they DIDN'T!!!!!"

 

"Mmm... the picnic, the wine, the candles... so romantic..."
"Yeah... so can I still take you up the wrongan...?"



"Dey are arming torpedoes"
"But why?"
"I think cos you said "there's a schnouzer in my weinerschnitzel""

 

DEANNA:"According to the database, the first Rikers lived in Alaska as long ago as the late 19th century. In fact...the first ones opened up a popular brothel outside of a gold mine in the year 1898."

WILL:"The more we change...the more we stay the same!"




SCOTTY:"Quick...tell the bloody Klingons we've got a FedEx delivery, or else they'll send a ship to open fire on us!!"

 

Will: "And it seems we changed our name to 'Palin' for a hundred years or so ..."




Though chubby, post-Op Hikara Sulu always enjoyed her return visits back to the Enterprise.

 

RIKER:"I like what you're doing to my neck."

DEANNA:"That's your NECK?

Will, you need to see Beverly. NOW."



UHURA:"Can you believe the NERVE of those Klingons?

Trying to ask me out on a date...and they don't even know what SPECIES I am!!"

 

Uhura: Taq baq Qui Chi tach!

Scotty: Uhura! You're reading a recipe for Raktajino!

Klingon Monitoring Station: That sounds delicious. I'll take two and a blueberry muffin.



"You haven't done that in a long time. What you're doing to my neck. Obviously, you have forgotten what that does to me. Computer, freeze Son'a report from this time index, and transfer to my quarters. If you need me, I'll be cleaning shit out of my uniform."

 

Chekov: "So then I told the keptin to go wuck himself. That's vhy I was vorking vaste extraction vhen Khan vas here."

 

SCOTTY:"Good bloody JOB, Uhura!!

Ye just ordered four plates of gagh and a shovel draped in velvet from the Klingons!!"




RIKER:"Behave, Deanna.

Or else NO studded pleasure glove tonight. And I'll even take away the giggle stick."

 

Scotty was late to the proceedings, but showed up JUST in time to catch Jim Gaffigan's routine about protein-resequenced Hot Pockets.

 

Chekov: How do you say "nuclear wessels were a Russian inwention" in Klingon?
Ensign: That does it. I'm gonna knock him out.